:)

It felt so nice to be able to sleep until my body woke me up this morning, instead of having my wake-up time be dictated by an alarm clock. My bladder woke me up around 10:30 this morning, but I kindof wish that I wouldn't have slept that long. I have so much stuff to get done this weekend, and I really shouldn't be sleeping for 10 hours each night. But, it did feel nice to have the option. :D

...........................................................................................................

In other news. I was informed a few days ago that yet another friend of mine is going to be getting engaged. That makes 2 that are engaged and 1 that will be soon, and 2 of which are a year younger than me. It seems like everywhere I go, everyone is engaged or getting married. Not that I'm in a hurry to rush things, but I just can't help but wonder when that will be happening for me. I don't think that I'm feeling left out, but maybe I really am...?

I know that I want a family and it's really important to me. I want a husband and kids, and I want to be able to raise my children with the help of my hubby and watch them grow up. I want my parents to be able to enjoy spending time with their grandchildren before that's not possible anymore. I think the whole thing with Dad and his cancer has made me think about these things more. I want, more than anything, for him to be there to walk me down the aisle and to be there to welcome his grandchildren into this world.

When I was younger, I used to imagine how weird the "father-daughter" dance was going to be at my wedding, just because Dad and I never really do stuff like that. Now I can't imagine having my wedding without it! It's still probably going to be a little awkward because it's my Dad, and he gets emotional a lot more than he used to, but it would be far worse to not have him there at all.

I also wish that I had something of my grandma's to wear at my wedding. My oldest female cousin got grandma's wedding dress and her necklace (I think she had one) passed down to her from her mom (my aunt). And none of the other granddaughters really got anything. It's not that I want a valuable piece of jewelry to show off on my wedding day...that's not it at all. But, my grandma can't be there, and I just thought it'd be nice to have her represented in some way, maybe by a piece of her jewelry or something else that she used in her wedding. But my selfish cousin (mentioned above) snatched up all of her jewelry the day that everyone was going thru the house before we cleaned it out to sell it. I really hate people that put monetary value on everything!

In Grandma's "will," I got her grandmother's engagement ring, which is beautiful and something that Grandma wanted me to have, but it's way too small for my finger, so I have no hopes of wearing it. :( I'm the only daughter of the youngest daughter/child and I don't get to have anything passed down to me on my wedding day. In the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding," there's a scene where Tula's grandmother and her mother come into her room the night before her wedding, and her grandmother puts the little flower wreath on her head, and they all turn to look in the mirror. Three generations are represented in that reflection, and I wish that I could have that for my wedding. If I could pick 1 thing, anything, to have at my wedding, I would pick my grandparents.

To you who still have living grandparents (I do, as well), cherish your time with them. Don't ever forget how much they mean to you. Enjoy each and every day with them, and let them know that you love them. I sometimes fear that that's the 1 thing I didn't do enough...

So, this blog got a little more personal than I had intended, but I don't think it's a bad thing. This way, I can get my feelings "off my chest" without having to tell certain people how I feel about the way they have acted, so as not to cause any awkwardness at the next family gathering.

But now, I think I'm going to take Phillip (my spider plant) outside to play, since it looks like it's a lovely day out. :)